There's No Authority In This Maze: F The Police?

Like some others, I'm from the inner city and grew up a delinquent. Add that in with an authoritative father who ran a dictatorship (where my mother's power was second) ...and you have a young person that hated cops and everything they represented. In the African American community (for the majority) cops are seen as the bad people. They are the bad guys. The guys that take away your friends and family. The ones always pushing you around when you're hanging out with friends. The party crashers. The list goes on and on. But when you stop to think about it all...the cops are doing what they are suppose to and most often help us in the end.

On a Saturday night in the hood, walking with a friend of mine, I spit in some grass, a cop sees me, stops me, and before I could punch him in the face or run like hell and hope he didn't catch me gives me a ticket while I was asking myself why the hell was I giving him my real information since I had no ID on me. Was he right? No. The case was thrown out of court when I went in. Was it a part of his job? Yes in a way. Police officers where I'm from have a quota of how many tickets they need to hand out monthly (so they would walk around my neighborhood all the time looking to mess with someone). So of course things like this, repeated harassment while hanging out on a bench or just walking around will cause a mindset of hate and anger towards these people that have nothing but power.

But over time and as I grew in age...plus all the videos of idiots I see online where people resist arrest, yell at and hit officers, or do things that call for an arrest or at least attention, but act as if the cops were wrong...I see why cops do SOME of what they do. Like Dave Chappelle once said "Even though I don't generalize, I do do percentages and averages." So if I see someone with their pants sagging, boxers showing, and walking around the hood or chilling on the block...guess what I'll think of them? Same thing everyone else does...thugs n hoodlums. What belongs to their culture? Drugs, Guns, Alcohol. If you tell me that doesn't describe the current rap/new age hip hop culture, then you're a liar. So I don't blame cops for riding up on a curb to stop me and my friends for walking one late night especially since we did have weapons on us and were looking for revenge for a homie (someone I didn't even know directly) that was jumped and thank God we weren't searched.

So what is my point here:

• You can't win against cops, so why argue and scream and go crazy? You will lose at the end of the day. Why? We give them the rights and power to always win.
• Don't resist arrest...it will only make things worse for you. Even if one of your friends started recording it while you were beat down but didn't show you giving the cop a 3 piece combo.
• You might say F the police now, but I bet when something you can't fix on your own comes up...you'll be calling them for help or assistance (I know I have).
• That "No Snitching" crap is exactly what it is, crap. 48 Hours has taught us all that most homicides have someone snitching. Whether the case is solved or not. Someone (even the thugs) will snitch.
• Being a police officer is a job, not a characteristic. I'm proud to say I have cop friends that are great guys.
• Finally, a lot of the times when someone is arrested or the cops come to break up a party...there is a valid reason for it. Someone had to call them.

 Why do I feel like putting money up...that he deserves everything he gets??

You Don't Want Help Do You?: The Independence Lies

"The shoes on my feet - I bought 'em
The clothes I'm wearing - I bought 'em
The rock I'm rockin' - I bought it
'Cause I depend on me
If I wanted
The watch I'm wearin' - I bought it
The house I live in - I bought it
The car I'm driving - I bought it
I depend on me"
~ Independent Women Part 1, Destiny's Child

I think this is where it started. This was the foundation of the "I'm an Independent Woman" revolution. Now I'm all for women empowering themselves, feeling better about their lives, and working hard to be someone. No problem with that at all. But while I say that, I feel there are a lot of situations and events that was caused by this movement that caused things in society to go awry. I know what you're thinking...he is about to go and  bash women. No. Not at all. I love women that are truly independent. But that being said...I think people have a confusion as to what is independence, semi-independence, and dependence  or dependent and living with your parents but having a Burger King job to pay your cell phone bill and saying you're grown and independent. Well what are the definitions you ask? I will be gladly to share.

Based on the Webster's Dictionary:

Independence: "Not requiring or relying on others (as for care or livelihood)."

Semi-Independence: "Partially independent."

Dependent: "Relying on another for support (children)."

What is the confusion exactly? Because Destiny's Child said "All the women who independent, throw your hands up at me" and no one wants to feel left out and the odd ball, so every girl joined in and was jumping to be that independent women. Problem is...a lot of the females claiming independence, are in fact...semi-independent at most. Why? Well based on the actual definition of the word...you should not require dependence on anyone. But based on who I'm seeing call themselves independent, they're really just girls with a little bit of money in their pocket. They shout independence, but yet only can cover a small personal bill and new jeans now and again.

Lets make some examples....first lets bring up Rachelle. She's a bright young girl, intern at an accounting firm. She screams "I'm independent, everything I have I bought it. I got my own money"....but lets go deeper...she lives at home and her shopping sprees are covered by her father. That's NOT independence. How about Lisa, she is a bit young and has a job at Subways, but has her own crib and her father doesn't pay for anything...yet her boyfriend covers the bills since Lisa only makes enough to be ghetto fabulous. We can even visit Casey. She lives alone at home with her mom....the rest don't even matter. She's not independent. And college students are just as dependent as anyone else in these examples

See my points here? We are not even mentioning the females that say they are independent with a work study job and their parents pay all their bills. But you will still hear her screaming at the top of her lungs that she does everything on her own lol. And let's not go into the case of the girl that gets on guys because of what they are lacking, yet her daddy bought her car and pampers her with all her clothes and accessories. I can say I've seen the last example 1,001 times lol.

So what's my point here? There is nothing wrong with being young and semi-independent. Nothing wrong with being young and dependent. Whether parents, boyfriends, or just family members, its ok (until you get older, then its sad). They are there to lend a helping hand and in some situations a crutch. But at the same time...don't lie to yourself and others. Me? Everything I own...I bought. My bills covered by me. And I've lived on my own for years now. You don't hear me screaming "I'm independent". But damn Destiny's Child for starting a movement that cause females to lie to themselves even more than usual (which was then upstaged by Beyonce's 'Girls' song). 

Some of you are saying "Well they have to fake it till you make it", well I agree with that ideal to a point. What is that point? Where you're lying to yourself about the truth and getting on others because of it. So next time you see a woman saying she refuses to let a man be the head of the household...hear a female yelling at men about what she has because she feels someone cares...think about this song...and think about all the females that are in this movement lying to themselves...and paying the price because of it. What is the price? That's a long post in itself lol. Maybe one day though.

So is this a case of a female feeling independent or a black female fed up? Since we don't know the background....its a toss up.

How Do You Know Your Future Path?: Private Schools Vs Public Schools

Now this is something that I have talked about a couple times lately with friends and seen many people discuss. Also saw a number of wonderful documentaries talking about the U.S. school system and the success behind charter schools. So what am I here to say to you all? That my kids...will never go to a public school lol. And here's why: *Be warned, many stereotypes and generalizations are about to occur*

So lets start with public schools. Went to them my entire life and even for college. What's the problem with these public schools?

• The teachers. Not all of them, but I knew of many teachers that didn't care. Especially when teachers get their tenure lol. There is even a show coming out called Bad Teachers that covers this. Teachers get tenure and CAN NOT BE FIRED WHATSOEVER. So what happens to them? They are moved to another school or go through a slap on the wrist punishment.
• Violence. A lot of bad kids (yes, I believe in there being bad kids) end up just going to their zone schools. So a number of students from the wrong neighborhoods ends up with James bringing a gun to school (which happened in my high school and I had beef with James, so happy he was caught). And yes, it can happen in a private school...but how many fights and out of order issues do you think happen between the two?
• Education. The most important one. We all know that the education system we have is horrible. There are tricks used to fix and work around this. One of which being longer school days, incorporating technology, and the simplest...creating person relationships with students.
• Possibilities. Now anything can happen anywhere. But with less attention being given to students, the possibilities are endless. We all know about the girls giving head in the back hallways and on the staircases. I remember in the 7th grade, I would hang out with girls every day in the back staircase instead of going to lunch.

Problems with private/charter schools:

• The biggest issue I hear are the other students there are snobby...but I rather my kid have to be around snobby kids he can ignore or grow to want to beat out in life, then around kids that just want to hang out and do nothing.
• The girls end up going wild. And you telling me Shaquetta from M.S. 234 wasn't just on the block prostituting? People with that remark make it seem like girls in public schools don't end up wild and slutty. Some worse since they have less opportunities.

Though I made it a good distance with a public school education, don't be fooled...I know I would be ten times better off if I had a private school education. My biggest problem now that I'm working on is my vocabulary. I remember testing to go into a special middle school and got in, but my parents couldn't afford it. Then for high school, I barely missed the score needed to get into a school for science and math. Had a girlfriend that went there, she told me universities would come and they would be admitted wherever they liked. She ended up going to University of Florida. When my school had college fairs...the main stands in our gym were all military services and community colleges. So you look at me and tell me private and charter schools aren't the best thing for kids. On average, your goals are smaller, your opportunities are smaller, and the people laying out the right path for you just aren't there.

Searching For The Next Move Wont Help: God's The Answer?

I've come to a conclusion these days...people expect for everything to be solved with God and religion. Is this actually true that it will? No. If you know me, you would know that I am a very religious Muslim man. I praise God and thank him daily for all that he has done for me and my family. We're very blessed. But that being said...even during times of poverty, sadness, and whatever else the world throws at people to have them in a state of needing an answer...we prayed to God for help in doing what we needed to do and went out and did it ourselves hoping he would be there. But what is the main point there? That we didn't use God as a crutch or to put everything on him, like he's going to magically come down and throw us a million dollars with some answers to questions.

And that's what I think is wrong today with some of the people out there. Not to mention the nuts in these mega-churches that think the pastor/reverend is some kind of messiah or prophet. Can someone explain to me when it became God's job to fix your relationship or take you out of your situation? That's crazy talk to me. I say God is there in order to guide us in the right direction, not to come from the sky with baby milk since you spent the money on the club. Yes, I know there are tons of families out there in bad situations because of chance or life...but that still doesn't give them a reason to go and put everything in hopes that God will save them without them putting in some work also. Pastors say it all the time, "God helps those that help themselves". Putting all your cards on God while holding your weed in one hand, a bottle of Ciroc in the other, and crying about not being able to make it out the projects after losing your job and not having enough money to pay the mortgage instead of doing your best to solve the issue (even if it includes filling for Bankruptcy) is what will lead to a long line of living on the edge. Once saw a woman with a kid on True Life (on MTV)...her income (which was only from child support) couldn't pay all of her bills (though she lived alone instead searching for someone to live with). How did she manage? She would randomly end up with money each month from different sources. How long can you last like that?

When i was younger, I heard someone say that Christianity is the poor man's religion. When you think about such a statement, the first thing that should come to mind is the fact that so many Americans are Christians (from all kinds of economic levels). Then you might stop and think...hold on...are we considering Christianity to be all sects, or are we diving them up? I know I don't consider Catholics to be the same (especially after going to a Catholic church). But then you think about all the people in low income neighborhoods that rely on God for everything. Makes you wonder why the ratio of higher economic people are in churches less often and talk about it less...or is it just based on the specific cultures they belong to. And honestly, I agree....Christianity is the poor man's religion. I can go on for days making little points about why, but that will end will an extra long post lol. Think about it yourself and tell me what you think. Does religion (all religions included) give an excuse for people in bad situations to stay there? Is it a way for people to pass the blame of their situation and what has happened to them? Or is it just the personality of those individuals all wrong??

Wonder how real or valid the below pictures are....? And if they are valid, I see a connection between economy and religion lol

Story Time (By memory): There once was a woman that was lost at sea in a small boat. Away from everyone and no way to call for help, she waited for a sign from God. A ship came by and saw her in need of help. She told him : "No thank you, God is coming to help me and will provide a sign". The ship left along with the crew. Another ship came and saw her. When they came close, she told them: "No thank you. I'll be ok. God will save me and show me a sign". As time passed...the woman died. When she got to heaven she asked God: "Hey, I was in need of your help, why didn't you save me or show me a sign?". Then God replied: "I did send you signs, I sent two ships that wanted to save you."

Was The Tumbleweed Tossing By?: Lateness

So yeah, I have been off this for a while...why you might ask? No reason in particular. No excuse. No big reason or anything. I just haven't been in the blogging mood. What I do though, is read other people's blogs. Its an every day thing for me lol. I spend a lot of time getting into the thoughts and beliefs of others. So yes, I am back. Going to be putting out  a lot of things I have in mind (as always I've had things I been dying to write about, but don't put them out for some reason) and welcoming more people reading this blog. I can see the stats, so I get to see the hundreds of visitors that come by and read the site. Thank you to everyone. And yes, this is me saying I will be posting on a more regular basis again. Sorry about the away time lol.

Did You Really Enter The Maze?: The Lal Bihari Experience

So I know its been forever, and I just got out the gym, but I thought it was about time I wrote a new post. Like always, my mind has tons of things to talk about, but I slack when it comes to actually putting it all out there. So here I am...A friend of mine and a reader of this blog told me about a topic she wanted me to cover. What is it? Lal Bihari. I know what you're thinking...who or what is that lol. Well I didn't know at first either. And I think she did it in order to see how my mind will attack suck a thing. Or maybe just to open up the idea to you guys.

Lal Bihari was a simple farmer with an outrageous story. Where does it really start? With his own uncle paying off some government official in India to write him off as deceased in order to get his land lol. Of all things. And he didn't even know until he hit up a bank for a loan. Imagine that conversation lol. I would have been in shock and aw...after causing a riot of course and starting a fire of course. So what did he do? He did something that I feel only a few people would do...he didn't go after his uncle to kill him or go to the police as the only resort....he started the Association of the Dead (Mritak Sangh). It was a coalition of people that this very same thing happened to. Maybe not for the reason of land or officials being paid off, but it had a hundred members when he started, and now has over twenty thousand.

What the hell has to be going on in India for that to be happening lol. First thing an American would be thinking...well they have an unorganized system and so many people, its easy to see how people can easily go missing or "dead" lol. Well it is what i was thinking about. I mean, how the heck would I feel if I was "dead" and walking around thinking everything was fine....wait....you know what that means....no school loans lol. I would do it. In. A. Heart. Beat. But then again I wouldn't have the ability to vote (while Bihari actually ran in an election to prove he was alive).

I guess this just shows us something...when the world gives you lemons...you organize all the lemon holders and fight against the powers that allowed you to be given those damn lemons to begin with lol. find a way to make the best of it (not going to say lemonade since its hard to make a good lemonade). I must say though...you have to respect a man that wouldn't stop trying. Especially when his death can only be categorized at some time within a 18 year span.

This is the face of a man that literally faced death and won lol

Do You Feel That Draft?: The Shay Affect

So some of you readers know who I am in real life. Some of you only know me online. But if you know me long enough, you would have known that I was never the suave guy that had all the ladies (but my charm now definitely can win them over). For some reason people that didn't know me thought I had all the ladies, but so far from true lol. Most people will agree...we chase the ones we want, while the one we should want is chasing us. That was my case in many ways. Still kinda is, but everything I do or don't do is for a reason now. But where am I going with this? Today someone popped into my head. A female that meant a lot to me. Yes...this is me sharing again lol. Don't get use to it though. I really don't care to share my love life, but this is something that I felt was needed to be shared.

Who is she? What does she mean to me? What happened? Her name WAS Taisha Shay. She meant the world to me at one point (or that is what I felt, who knows if it was me being young and dumb), and what happened is a long story lol, so I'll give the just of it. We met when I was playing video games in my dorm room (which we had an open door/ walk-in policy). She walked in and said hello (She wore a fitted shirt and blue jeans skirt that was kinda long). After some jokes and flirting that day it became a regular routine for us. Once I knew she was single (she messed with some guy on and off), I jumped at my chance to be with her. Calling her to talk on the phone. Text messages that I know would make her smile. Sweet gestures. Spending time with her was hard at times, but that was there also. Outcome.....she went back to dude. But that doesn't mean my feelings for her died.

I ended up having a class with her the very next semester and my feelings for her grew. Joking around in class, flirting, and trying to always be in reach. When she was single again, I threw my hat in the race one more time. This time I went even harder. Landed in the same dorm (by accident) and would walk to her room when I got off work. I can't remember ever putting in such effort for one female. If I said all the little things I did and tried here, this post would be too long. I would question her wife material value at times though when I would see her drunk after parties, but then again, that's what college was about at our age, so I overlooked it. And I definitely hoped many times she would come with me after those parties lol. I even remember going in for a kiss one time and her putting a pause to my effort and telling me "Not yet, we need to be together first". Outcome....she went back to ole dude....but that doesn't mean my feelings for her died.

I transferred to another school and so did she. We kept in contact though. Facebook is always a great tool for that lol. But here we were...more mature and ready for settling down (or at least that's what we thought). Talked about plans and what kind of things we would do together. Long phone conversations. Then whenever plans were made....nothing happened. Back then I blamed myself. I was a broke college student with phone problems and no car. Nevertheless, with time I realized something....those days I would still call and message her throughout the times to get in contact with her...while she was unreachable and only once she called back. When I saw the missed call, I repeatedly called back to no avail. Funny thing was...I had broken up with my girl in order to be with her (and my girl knew). Though as you might have expected...the Outcome....she ended up with someone else and I told her I was done chasing her....but that doesn't mean my feelings for her died.

So what happens now? I transferred schools again and landed in Albany, NY. Went back with the girl I broke up with (and she followed me to the new school). But here comes Ms. Shay back in my life. We begin talking about how crazy it is that we want to be together with such distance (about 3-4 hrs driving). Nevertheless, we were both willing to give it a try. I was smarter now though, so I didn't break up (yeah, its cheating in a way) and didn't get my hopes high....when my phone calls slowly stopped being answered and she stopped reaching out to me...I let it go. Then when I saw wedding photos...I died a bit inside. We stayed in contact nonetheless...we were friends. Funny how it amused her to hear about the feelings I had though. I loved her. Now was it the same love I had for the two main relationships of my life? No. But it was what it was. Outcome....I'm in Michigan having a thought about her. Will I ever go and try to be with her? Hell No!! I'm a lot smarter now. Never would I be with someone that passed on me for another man. I refuse! Though...I can't even remember the number of times I would sing along with Bob Marley ~ Waiting In Vain (in the hundreds to thousands).

So while you read this and feel sorry for me, I write this and laugh at that idiot that thought he would win her heart. Sometimes you have to be a fool before you can grow. Fool me once...shame on you....fool me all those times and I kept falling for it....I was an idiot lol. We're good in my book and she knows it. After all the B.S. I still have love for you Mrs. Taisha Shay-Owens....or is it Mrs. Taisha Owens?